What is So Important from Me?

          What is "important" mean? According to Oxford Language Dictionary Importance mean is great significance or value; likely to have a profound effect on success, survival, or well-being. So what is so important from me? Sometimes I do think about that. A lot of people say that I just overanalyzing. Well, maybe they are right but I still can't stop thinking about that. Besides that, I know that a lot of people out there are thinking the same. "Have they liked us? Or do they just need us?" thoughts like that pop's out because we scared that people are not actually like us, they be friends with us because they know that being friends with us can give them benefits.

          Thinking of these, again and again, made us overthink, and according to Mrs. Indah Sundari Jayanti, M.Psi, one of the Indonesian psychologists, overthinking can cause stress and depression. Depression is a common and serious medical illness that negatively affects how we feel, the way we think, and how we act. Depression gonna causes feelings of sadness and/or a loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed. So it means you are not gonna enjoy your hobbies anymore. Besides of lead to a variety of emotional problems, depression can cause a variety of physical problems too and can decrease your ability to function at work and home. Goodly, it is also treatable. But that doesn't mean that you don't have to take it seriously.

          Talking about depression, a lot of people underestimate this condition by associating it with religion. They said "You're nowhere near God" or "you shall repent". It is a pity because on one side people try their best to speak up and spread awareness about how important mental health is. On the other hand, more and more people have labeled a person with a mental illness as a person who is far from his God. Perhaps that's why we shall keep our social circle small. From my perspective, I don't mind being alone rather than being with someone that would invalidate my feelings.

          So now we know how overthinking can lead us to depression and how dangerous depression is. So we must stay away from overthinking so we can keep ourselves from depression. And if we want to stay away from depression we must stop caring too much about what people think about us, feel okay when people don't think that we are important for them, love ourselves, and stop overthinking.

          One of the many causes of overthinking is when we care too much about what people think about us and we must stop doing this ASAP. To stop caring too much about what people think about us, we can keep things in our perspective because if we think that doing something is okay then just do it as long as it's not harming other people and ourselves. Besides that we can let go of perfection, we don't have to be perfect, nor do we always have to fit into other people's standards. We should be ourselves and continue to improve ourselves to be a better version of ourselves, not to be someone else just to fit in other people's standards. So the point is we don't always have to fit other people's expectations, it doesn't matter even if people don't like us, not being liked by others is not a very bad thing as long as we are not a bad person, they don't like us just because our personality doesn't match their personality.

          When we can stop thinking about what other people think of us, now we should talk about how to make us feel okay even if someone doesn't think we are important. Let me tell you, as human beings, we live through many important things and meet many people, and not a few people we meet become important people in our lives. But that doesn't mean that everyone we meet will become an important person right? This happens not because that person doesn't deserve to be considered important in our life, but because other people are more meritorious in our lives who make that person very important to us. So we don't need to be sad when there is someone who thinks we are not an important person in his life, maybe he has someone who is more meritorious in his life who makes that person very important to him. And there must be other people who think that we are very important in their life.

         If we already stop caring too much about what people think about us and feel okay when people don't think that we are important for them. Let's talk about how to love ourselves. Before we love ourselves we must respect ourselves first. I ever heard some quotes that say "If you don't respect yourself, then how other people can respect you" so we must respect ourselves if we want other people to respect us. If we already respect ourselves we can start loving ourselves by stop comparing ourselves to others, allowing ourselves to make mistakes, don't be afraid to let go of toxic people, trusting ourselves to make good decisions for ourselves, putting ourselves first, being kind to ourself, and make ourself happy.

          Last but not least is, overthinking. How to stop overthinking? In my personal experience when I start to overthink, I'm gonna read a novel, listen to music, watch youtube, work on my homework, play guitars, scroll over my social media, play video games, play with my brother, or sometimes I just go to my room and sleep. Because I think I'm better to be asleep than just overthinking, I mean if you are sleeping your body take a rest, and if you are overthinking, it's just wasting your time and your mind, and it doesn't give you any benefits. You don't have to do the same thing as me to stop your overthinking, you can just do your favorite activity and make yourself busy, so you are not gonna have time to overthink. So the conclusion is that it's okay if we are not important in someone's life, this will not affect our lives, it's not like they don't care about us, they just have someone more important in their life, who is more meritorious for them. And don't forget to love ourselves, we have to stop caring too much about what people think about us so that we can stop overthinking. And we can live our lives more peacefully and in better physical and mental conditions.